We often feel that we are one of the most suffering people on this planet. And constantly try to fix our problems to the best solutions with the power of imagination. As humans, we are given a boon of imagination and memory; how well we manage them is what defines our lives. Let us look at how these two aspects drive our lives and how we have left ourselves to the fate of runaway thoughts & reactions. In turn, these uncontrolled aspects drive us crazy, and we unknowingly fall into the trap of our imagination (future) and memories (past), forgetting to live the present.
At Skynotch, we conducted a survey, and the responses were quite self-explanatory. Let us look at each response and further understand the meaning of the answers that define our control or runway.
The majority of the response defines that anxiousness is there in most of the people for future. This anxiousness results from our constant expectations from life which we build from the imagination or aspiration we have about living our lives in a certain way.
Especially since Nov 2019, since COVID19 has driven our lives in unexpected directions, the cases of anxiety has rocketed. We have programmed our minds to follow a pattern. When we have to change, psychologically, we get disturbed, creating anxiousness. While we also offered the solutions to anxiety that are accessible to people without any external help, the results were distorted. People have their way to overcome the stress, and there no specific majority to the solution. Yet, something we have been taught since childhood is what we largely adopt: a diversion of thought to something more pleasing to balance out the disturbing feeling.
Another factor (relationship) getting disturbed due to our failure to control our reactions. Uncontrolled reactions dominate the problems that are caused in one’s life. One reacts in majority cases due to what reasons we will see incoming questions. But before that, let us understand if we feel inappropriate after the reaction delivered that was unmanaged.
These responses were overwhelming. In all cases, people feel guilt after the uncontrolled reaction. Yet, the answer to the following question is further astonishing.
We are hesitant to note the reason for the reaction to avoid it in future. We follow firefighting mode most of the time by either fixing the situation or running away from reality. We miss fixing the root cause of the problem.
A relief to the answers to the above question is none believe in withdrawal. The majority have the strength to either try to work in tandem with the person with whom the disconnect is there or learn to accept the person with their positives or negatives.
Now in the next question, let us see if, on discussion do people also feel that they are equally responsible for their actions. They also require to change their behaviour patterns before judging the other person in the relationship and accept them as they are.
And the answer to this question was a pleasant thought that yes, every coin has two sides to be reviewed to know the authenticity. Similarly, every relationship has two people before judgement; it is crucial that we introspect ourselves and not miss to identify our flaws other than the uncontrolled reactions. Understanding our behaviour of anxiousness, reactions, and relationship issues brings us to the survey’s last question. Why do we have anxiousness, reactions and relationship issues? When we judge the other person based on fair discussion and conduct self-introspection, what is the significant reason for all the above problems in our lives?
The response to this question tells us that most of us are part of the trap of imagination and self-belief due to memory. We imagine a better future making us stress out as part of constant expectations from ourselves or others and the lifestyle we want to live. When these expectations are not fulfilled, we get disappointed and frustrated, leading to a lack of emotional management.
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